I admit, the whole “adding a moustache to random stuff” thing is getting out of hand. Can’t blame the Burt Reynolds fan who tricks out his ride with a Carstache, though, because it’s absolutely gorgeous.
What’s a Carstache? It’s a fake giant moustache that you attach to a car’ grill using three rubber-coated wires, turning your ride from a dilapidated wreckage into a savvy, worldly-wise magical vehicle. It will still run like crap and die on you when you can’t afford it, but it’s got a moustache, so things will always be okay. Really.
Measuring 34 x 12 x 3 inches, the manly, burly lump of hair makes sure your car gets the attention it deserves. Granted, it might not be the kind of attention that gets girls lining up to plop on the passenger seat, but stranger things have happened. It’s made from weather-resistant synthetic material, so it should hold up to the ravages of daily use, and comes in an array of dazzling colors (black, orange, blonde, pink and gray).
Why pimp your ride when you can make it look like Tom Selleck? There’s no acceptable reason. Imagine a guy with a moustache; now, imagine the same guy without one. Feel the difference? That’s exactly the same sensation that a macho strip of facial hair can lend your car, all without having to suffer through milk drooping from it in the morning.
The Carstache is available for $39 and can make your car awesome for all eternity. Until somebody covets the awesomeness and steals it in the parking lot, that is, so we recommend stashing it inside for safety when you’re not driving.